Devanshu Singh

Tom's retreat just gave me my first true spiritual experience. Before this, I was motivated mostly by reducing my anxiety and fulfilling some goals in life in work and social life. In this retreat, I really faced some feelings of anxiety and anxiety about anxiety. Once I was able to face those, I let go in sadhana to an extent I hadn't really ever done consciously. I felt like I was one with the rest of the group and our chanting was creating something bigger than ourselves in that room. I looked over and saw a statue of hanuman and I felt what it means to have devotion to something, which was inspired by his position of taking a knee. I felt like all of my goals and worries before were put in context of what life really is and what I really want, which is just to experience that energy over and over again with lots of other people around. I felt the sense of devotion to facing challenges in life so that I could create more room and space for that energy and really protect it. From now on, I'm less motivated by an intense attachment to my goals or by just trying to relax and escape anxiety, and more by trying to recreate that sense of connection and oneness wherever I go. Also this was the fourth time I've done retreat with many of the same people. They feel like very close friends and family now and many of them have stayed over at my place. You really grow together with these people over time and that's a special experience you take with you forever. Love you guys, you know who you are.